May the words of my mouth and the meditations of each of our hearts be acceptable in thy sight, O God, our Lord and Redeemer.
It is said that pride is a sin, and sin should never be celebrated. But there are two kinds of pride. The first is the satisfaction that can come from your own accomplishments. This type can turn into vanity, which is something to avoid. “Look how great I am”. The second kind of pride is a consciousness of one’s own human dignity. That’s what Pride Month is meant to be for the LGBTQ community: a recognition of the human dignity of a group of people who have, for centuries, been treated with contempt, rejection and violence.
Many “good” Catholics, those who consider themselves devout, may express objection to marking Pride Month during the same month that we celebrate the Month of the Sacred Heart. But, as I see it, the two are complementary, not contradictory. The Sacred Heart teaches us how Jesus loves; Pride Month reminds us, whom Jesus invites us to love today. Where would the Sacred Heart be today? It would be poured out in love on those who seek love and acceptance. So, the two celebrations not only are not in conflict but are deeply complementary. One shows us shows us how Jesus loved. The other shows us whom Jesus calls us to love.
The Gospel of Matthew tells us, Jesus ministered to crowds of people who are described as “harassed and helpless” There were so many in need of healing and assistance, that Jesus calls his twelve disciples and gives them “authority” to minister to the crowds as well. The compassion shown by Jesus is as necessary today as it was in first-century Palestine. In a homophobic society characterized by such things as verbal and physical abuse, violence, religious prejudice, legalized employment discrimination and high rates of suicide among queer youth, LGBT folks can easily feel that they are numbered among those who are most “harassed and helpless.” Ministry with LGBT folks is therefore an important calling, to which, unfortunately, relatively few ministers or churches have been willing to respond.
LGBT people of faith, however, do not simply need ministry. They are also called to ministry. Like the disciples of Jesus, many LGBT folks find themselves responding to a summons from God to work among those who are, as Jesus recognizes, “like sheep without a shepherd”. As a gay priest, I believe that it is my duty to minister to ALL God’s children no matter who they are. Many Christians find it difficult to accept LGBT persons as ministers. Some churches explicitly prevent LGBT people of faith from serving as pastors or even volunteers. For people who support such policies, the suggestion that God might call LGBT people and give them “authority” for ministry seems incredible. I, myself sometimes get asked, “How can you be a priest and be gay?” I respond with, “God created me in His image AND called me to the priesthood. Got a problem with that, take it up with Him”!
I was ordained just four days before the beginning of Pride month 12 years ago. I reflect on my journey to the priesthood during this time. My then partner encouraged me to pursue formation in the Independent Catholic church that he was a member of. Mind you, I did not grow up Catholic but rather in the United Church of Christ. After much prayer and contemplation, I took the leap of faith and finally answered the call to ministry that I received many years earlier.
I know that God has a sense of humor; he made me, a dirty-minded, foul-mouthed gay man a priest and messenger of His Holy Word. I am far from perfect, but I fully trust in God’s judgment of and will for the “what, where, when, why, and how” of my life. The18th cent. poet, playwright, and statesman, Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, wrote, "If God had wanted me otherwise, He would have created me otherwise." Think about that for a moment, "If God had wanted me otherwise, He would have created me otherwise." I find these to be comforting words in this time of hate, injustice, and division. God created, and loves all of us just as we are, no matter our gender, our orientation, our identity, flaws and all. If God had wanted us otherwise, He would have created us otherwise. Talk about unconditional love!! God speaks to us in that still small voice telling us of His love for us.
I read the posts of so many of my siblings in Christ in the Facebook group LGBTQ Christians. Many of them refer to coming out to family, friends, and their church. They are riddled with fear, and often times self-loathing; questioning why they are what they are. Far too many of them bring me to tears and I find myself at a loss for words to reply with. I say to them, just know that I am here for you and pray for you all to find peace and balance in your lives. Do not and I repeat do not give up or give in. We are all beloved children of God created in His image just as we are. In the words of Troy Perry, founder of Metropolitan Community Church, "The Lord is my Shepherd, and he knows I'm gay.”
As we celebrate Pride month, I think about my coming out process and the 40 odd years since. Wow, what a journey. I am thankful to God for having had a fairly easy coming out process. I am grateful for all of my friends who were there for me and encouraging me to be myself. I am also grateful for my family and their acceptance of my orientation. As for my church, total acceptance. I tear up when I remember my dad’s response when I told my parents that I was gay. He said simply, “You are my son and I love you. As long as you are happy so am I.”
Today, right now and right here, let us promise to be present for each other, uplift each other, and have faith that no matter what, God loves us as his beloved children. As St Paul wrote in his letter to the Corinthians, “we walk by faith and not by sight” I promise you all that I will always be in your corner fighting alongside you for acceptance, equality and justice. In the words of the actor and gay icon, Harvey Fierstein, (I wish that could imitate his voice for this) "Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself." We are all created in God’s image and are loved. Never ever forget this!! May we all have a truly Happy and Blessed Pride month.
Let us pray:
O God, you come and offer aid and comfort even after tough days, defeated days, days without hope. O God, in gratitude for your very presence, turn me to ministering to others who suffer during tough days, defeated days, days without hope.
Amen
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